Thursday, July 11, 2013

Bayou Life

In our media driven world the marshes, bayous, and plantations of Louisiana are all the rage.  The great state of Louisiana is now considered one of the most filmed locations outside of Hollywood.  For some it's the old southern charm of a plantation home.  For others it's the long and storied history of New Orleans.  And for most it's the sportsman's paradise.  As one friend put it, "Where else can you catch Red fish and Bass on the same trip?"  Then for reasons I don't understand most people (not from here) think that Mardi Gras is year round. Life in the bayou is slightly different than the movies. Let me burst a few bubbles for you.

First, to live in Louisiana you must know how to live on, off, from, and in the water.  You can't go more than three miles in any direction without hitting a bayou, swamp, lake, river, or canal.  So if  you are on dry land, you can't get lost.  Venture out into the swamp and it's a different story.  Most people either fish or have a brother in law that fishes for a living.  Everyone knows how to catch mud-bugs and make a meal out of them. Teaching your kids how to peel crabs, shrimp, and crawfish is a right of passage.  It doesn't matter if your 20 plus years old, if you can't peel your own then your still a baby.  Then you must know the direction of water flow to live in the swamp.  Most places around the world the river in considered the lowest place because the river usually carves out the land.  In Louisiana the banks of the river are the highest point you can be at.  That's why it's called a delta, because the land is built up from the river overflowing and depositing it's silt.  So the water always drains from the river out to the marshes.  Also, water comes in different forms, there is muddy river water, there is brackish lake water, and salty gulf water.  Notice there is no fresh water.   Next, not everyone in Louisiana practices voodoo.  It's the bible belt for crying out loud!  There is a church on every corner and on Sunday they are all full.  The whole reason Mardi Gras is such a big deal is because the overwhelming number of Catholics are about to enter the Lenten season.  The amount of fish consumed on a Friday, during Lent in Louisiana is staggering.  Voodoo is just for show down in the French Quarter to scam tourist out of their money.  And yes Mardi Gras only last a couple of weeks.  Speaking of tourist, plantations are a dime a dozen.  I don't have to hear your accent to know you are not from around here.  All I have to do is be behind you on the river road and realize you are stopping to take a picture of a house I pass three times a day.  The term "scenic route" is a contradiction in terms.  If you stop in the middle of the highway to take a picture then it's not a route at all.  Anyone who thinks it would have been great to live in a plantation has obviously never lived without A/C.  Not only is it hot it is steaming in the swamp.  I'm not sure what "dry heat" is but when the temperature is 98 degrees and the humidity is 90 percent it's hard to breathe.  I met a nurse who had moved here from Canada, she said the first three Summers here she cried all Summer because of the heat and humidity.  By the way it's Summer nine months of the year here.  She cried a lot.  All these movies they film of some detective walking along the bayou with a sports coat on is pure Hollywood fantasy.

Life in the bayou is hard but like everything else, it has it's rewards.  We work all day in oppressive heat but come dinner time, we get to enjoy some of the finest food in the world.  We literally eat everything. Where else can you enjoy some muscadine wine, garfish balls, and boudain?  Never wanted to do a recipe blog but maybe I should do one on the diversity of food in Louisiana.  Great now I'm hungry.  We speak our own accent and sometimes our own language because we are truly a melting pot of French, Spanish, Irish, Indian, and a few others.  We still stop on side the road to help some one who has broke down or to let a funeral procession pass by.  Our family includes everyone we know.  Blood might be thicker than water but it's the waters that connect us all.  So I guess it's only fitting that Hollywood would want to film this unique life we live, but trust me the movies don't come near to the real thing.  So meh shay, I hope you get to come to the bayou, pass a good time, fill your belly with some etouffee, dance at the fais do do, and live the good life that can't be captured on a movie screen.