Just a Parent! Watching my Son receive his Eagle Rank.

2012 Eagle Badge

So tonight was the big night.  After months of planning, we finally pulled off my Son's Eagle Court of Honor.  My Son made Eagle on December 23, 2012, but you have to have a ceremony to wear the badge.  Being the highest honor in Scouting and only 2 percent of Scouts ever earn it, the ceremony is for the Eagle recipient alone.  I have had the privilege of attending and even being emcee of many of these events.  It is always a special occasion and pride seems to abound in the room.  This however, was a different thing altogether.  To sit a watch as these people esteemed my Son was a thing that should be experienced by all parents.  That's really the difference for me, to just be a parent.  Not the emcee or the leader.  Not to be entrusted with someone else's kid.  To just sit back and enjoy the fact that I'm the father of this accomplished young man.

Just a parent?  Now there's a concept for you.  Just a parent who takes a baby home from the hospital.  To realize that every breath that child takes for the next eighteen plus years is your sole responsibility.  Just a parent, who endures six months of colic.  That's six months of no more that twenty minutes of sleep for those of you who are math challenged.  Just a parent praying his Son will do well at school.  Hoping that he makes friends and doesn't become one of those kids that doesn't fit in.  Just a parent that agrees to go along with this whole "let's be a Cub Scout and go camping" insanity.  Just a parent, who sits and studies for a third grade spelling test.  Just the parent, who watches his eighth grader go out for the High School Band.  Just a parent, that says, "sure Son run for band officer as a freshman".  Just the parent that agrees to sleep on the ground at fourteen degrees at winter camp.  And the parent that sleeps on the one hundred and four degree scorched Earth of summer camp.  Just the parent that sends a fifteen year old on a plane to Boston to compete in a math competition in a society full of terrorist whacks!  Just a parent that sees to it that every need his child could possibly have is accounted for.

Maybe parent is the wrong word.  Maybe I should just be called proud.  That's all I could think of standing up there as my friend pinned my Son with his Eagle badge.  Proud that he passed all the test of sixteen years of life.  And even more proud that I didn't screw up the first sixteen years of his life.  Proud that when it came time to push him, he was up to the task.  Proud that so many would come out to honor my boy.  Proud that my boy is in rare company.  That he will always be known for being the best of the best.  To be just a parent is to be justly proud.

Fatherhood! What's is it?

Fatherhood is something I like to talk about. Even if it's like screaming into the wind in today's America. In school, many classes talk about the Fathers of different things. The Father of an invention, the Father of a faith, or even the Fathers of our Nation. How utterly confusing this must be for kids? Considering nearly half of the kids in this country go to sleep every night in a home that their Father does not live. The number is even higher for minorities, but that would take away from what I'm driving here.

While I will never dispute the need for a Mother's love, there are some things only a Father can provide for a child. Self confidence can only come from a child that clearly sees his Father believing in him. A child's self worth or identity comes from the tough love of a Father. It molds a child into what he must be. Loyalty, although displayed by the Mother, is ingrained into a child's mind by seeing his Father there in the midst no matter what the outcome. The understanding of how to treat a young lady comes from seeing a Father respect a Mother. Most importantly, security comes from a Father. Whether it's knowing the "monster under the bed" won't get you, or knowing Dad always has my back. A child without a Father's security will develop issues with all the earlier mentioned qualities.

Being a Father is not as hard as it sounds. To teach your life's experiences to you child can fill up your heart with pride to see their eagerness to learn. To believe that your child can go farther in this life than you, is a hope that fuels the soul. Most men stay loyal to a job for decades, so it should be easy to commit your years to always be seen supporting your child. The best is to give love to a child that can except it unconditionally. Then sit back a let a child return your love to you with an energy and exuberance that is all consuming. It is a reward that can not be matched.

The only thing that keeps men from being Fathers is the perverted view of this society. "Don't let no one hold you down" or "be free of a ball and chain" is just a misdirection to keep you from enjoying the privilege of being a Father. My Sons are not only my pride and joy, they are my crowning achievement in this life.

So be a Father. Not just to your on children, but to all children that would seek your Fatherness. Whether it's teaching, or coaching, or mentoring, or sharing, if you show a little bit of Fatherhood, children all around will be begging for more. There's something about loving a child like a Father that earns that child's loyalty.

What would this nation look like if every Father acted like a Father?