Most couples have big plans for their bouncing bundle full of joy when they bring a child into this world. Everyone wants a better life for their kid than the one they had as a child. Then you take home your baby boy and reality hits you square in the head. It's a job just to keep up with the feeding schedule, the diaper changes, the constant crying, and the dirty laundry full of puke. Parenting is hard work and I haven't even mentioned the job you have to have to pay for little Johnny's things. Then after a four or five years you get to send your precious toddler off to school. So you're thinking that school will make life a little easier. After all, having someone else chase after little Johnny is a well deserved rest for you. Then reality hits again. You have to help with homework, buy school supplies, keep the correct uniform, clean the uniform every night, and my personal hell on Earth, sit in the carpool line. I can handle road rage but those moms in the car pool line are the most rude creatures I've ever had the misfortune to meet. Then Johnny is ready for sports. Time consuming is an under statement when it comes to your kid playing sports, or any non school activity. The point is, from the time you bring him home from the hospital till they leave your house kids are a nonstop job.
So when do you have time to sit little Johnny down and explain to him all your hopes and dreams for his life? Truthfully, you are so busy with your kid's life, once you get a spare minute you just want to relax. You start telling yourself that you deserve time off. And that's where parents get off track in achieving their goals for their kids. We work so hard at the things we must do, therefore any spare time is for rest and relaxation. So what is little Johnny learning? Truth is he is learning to live life the same way you do. Just do the bare minimum to survive and the rest of the time is for idleness. I've heard it all in the circles I deal with such as scouting, band, sports, and schooling. Lines like, "I work hard to earn my money so I deserve a vacation" or this one, "my Son is a good kid, he deserves to go to theme parks every chance he can". Your kid is learning from that attitude. That attitude is "just get by in life". Kids are taking notes from everything you say, do, act, or believe in. Don't ever think that you can tell your kid, "well Son, I might go out drinking every weekend but I don't want you to do that". Little Johnny will be sitting on a bar stool near you very soon. Your life is their lesson plan for their life.
This may seem like bragging but to me it just drives the point home that you are your child's lesson plan. My older Son is sixteen and this is a post he put on his Facebook page the other day.
This is probably random but I guess getting a job and going into my senior year has made me think about how much I love my parents and how they taught me to love among countless other things. They taught me that love is a selfless sacrifice. To love someone you have to give them your time, your effort, your everything no matter how difficult it is. My mom gives up most of her time working to support our family. My dad suffers everyday in pain but that never stops him from giving his time and knowledge to prepare my brother and I for the future. They really taught me that if I wanted to succeed at something I had to give it my everything. And we all make mistakes but they also taught me to not just quit when things are hard or I mess up. I really have no clue how I'll turn out but I'm sure it'll be great in some way because my parents succeeded in giving their everything to be the great parents they are. I couldn't have asked for better.
He gets it. He has taken notes of everything my wife and I have done over the years. Our life is clearly the lesson plan for his life. And the way he turns out will be great in some way because he paid attention. I assure you, your child is paying attention to your life. Make sure it's a life worth learning from.